Transformation

Looking back at my last post, seems like I was trying to let go of some of my strongholds. It has been REALLY difficult, but I must say, I feel like a different woman now..in a really good way.

Since my sister left (I've been living with her and my brother in law), I've been struggling on facing the fact that I am independent and fully in charge of myself. No one will catch me in case I fall. This did not push me to go back to my old ways and be stubborn or do something stupid to overcome what I was feeling, but with God's grace, I did something absolutely different. I noticed that I was always taking the high road (even though it's really difficult), I made a move of restoring my relationship with my family (which is a really good thing because I love them sooo much and I love having them around and I've been really grouchy for the longest time and I want to make up for it), and my hunger for God just grew so much that I started focusing on my relationship with Him (the most important). I make sure to attend Sunday service at church, joined a new small group, prayer and fasting, and whole lot of things in store. :)

For a month, went through a lot of things that I thought I would never experience, my faith was tested (and still being tested), things that made me surrender myself to the Lord. Most nights I'm crying my heart out to Him, because at this point, there is nothing I can do, but He can do what is impossible. It says in Mark 10:27 (NIRV) - Jesus looked at them and said, "With man, that is impossible. But not with God. All things are possible with God."

I'm learning a lot about walking in faith, trusting God's plan, being a person of prayer, courage, surrendering everything to God, perseverance, you name it. But I'm really glad that I was able to deal with communicating with others, expressing what I feel. Normally, I would just shut everyone out and be like, I don't care, whatever. But now, even though it was soooo hard for me to do, I started letting God in my heart 100% and take over my life, my sister (being able to explain what I feel) and my family. It was easier for me to process my emotions now than before, I don't feel like a time bomb that will explode any moment.

My sister told me that she's seeing a lot of good changes in me. I'm glad to hear that because I'm letting God take over my live. I always pray that people will see Jesus through me and to become the woman God says I am.

I know that there's a lot in store for me. I will still go through a lot of trials to polish me, but I'm ready, because with this battle, I have God by my side, He will fight this for me. He is the God of the impossible. I am claiming the victory now.