Starting Fresh

Today, I've decided that I'm going to make this blog what I want it to be. It will reflect on who I am now, different...better.

I'm going to write or re-blog all positive things I think or read. I noticed that all I wrote before are just negative. All I do was to whine and that's the reason why the same things keep on happening over and over again. And I refuse to settle for that feeling.

By the time I made a decision that I won't go through what I went through over the past, I started to become happy and peaceful. The things I thought matters most, just seems like non-sense now, my vices, the unnecessary night out with the people who I thought are my friends, etc.
I learned to lean on God, among other things. I pray to become the woman God planned me to be. It has been two months since I made that decision and I never looked back. I learned so much from my past and I acknowledge all my mistakes, I promised myself I wouldn't go back to that...ever again, I wouldn't even want to feel that way again.

On my birthday (29 September), it was a month after I decided to move forward and leave it all to God, to let His plans for me take place. That time, I was talking to my sister, and she told me how proud she was that I'm a totally different person than what she witnessed a month prior to my birthday. I told her that I felt so much better, I feel complete (rebuilding my relationship with God and my family), it's heart-warmingly good, that I'm crying because I feel truly happy. I realized that I was chasing after the wrong things and I make decisions based on my emotions...most of the time, while what I needed after all is to trust God, to trust that He has bigger plan for me than what I have for myself. My sister said, if you feel happy now, what more after a year, or two, or in the future. I should be more excited about what's going to be in store for me after a year. I'm really looking forward to see what God planned for me.

I'm still a work in progress and I know that the challenges will not stop here. I'm still dealing with a lot of issues, but I know that I'm so much stronger now and I know I could face all those weaknesses. I take it one day at a time.

In the future, I'll be posting about what I'm learning. I hope I could be an inspiration to some people, for them to know that you can always turn things around and we always have God who saves us each and every time. It's never too late.